aLL 'BouT 'Fe-Ar'

Me: Tomorrow is Vesak day.
Mom: Vesak day here is Saturday
Me: Huh? Why is it so strange?
Mom: Maybe Indonesia is further than Singapore...
Bro: Yea, that's why Buddha takes longer to reach Indonesia...
Me: Maybe he takes Lion Air and the flight is delayed...

No matter when Vesak Day is, I wish all a happy and blessed Vesak Day... Buddha blesses us all...

Sabbe satta bhavantu sukitattha...

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~

One of my conversation with bf
Me: Goldfish is getting more and more annoying!
bf: What is it this time?
Me: Anything Goldfish does just annoy me.
bf: I think you are going to bring a knife to the office sometime later.

I bumped into one of my contractor
Me: Hi.
He: Let's plan something to kill Goldfish!
Me: *burst into laugh*

In daily meeting
Contractor: Tomorrow we will start the activity after 3:30pm because there will be an event going on at the school.
Goldfish: But your machine is broken, right?
Contractor: No, we already repaired.
Goldfish: *pull out handphone and start typing*
Suddenly my phone vibrated and there was a message in a chat group
Goldfish: Contractor informs that the machine is already repaired. Please check on site.
After a while, site inspector replied with a photo showing the machine in working condition.
To our surprise, she replied, in caps lock: TEST TO ASCERTAIN THAT IT CAN WORK NOW.
I almost burst into tears. Goldfish is so funny.

So I have proof that Goldfish is indeed annoying.

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~

When I was tapping my card to open a door in HQ
Contractor: Huh? You have a card?
Me: -______________- I am a staff!

I don't suit here, do I?

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~

I was relaying this story to my best friend.

Once upon a time, in a meeting room, I was talking to one of my contractors. Someone was not very happy to see me talking to people, and that someone interrupted our small chat.

Someone: Tomorrow is your last day, huh?
Contractor: Noo, Saturday.

And a very surprising follow up I have ever heard came out of that someone's mouth, "Last Saturday, huh?"

So I told my friend, I don't know what was that inside that someone's head. Maybe the brain is not there, the brain is located inside the panties. The panties are washed very frequently so the brain is damaged.

What a smart girl my friend is. This is her response: Someone is a goldfish which every two seconds lose the memory and looks very blurred.

I laughed so hard. Alone. To my computer.

What a day.

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~

Moments back in my hometown are the best. I spent ten days although it felt like a blink of eyes. I was full of everything, I was content, I was showered with all the love and care. I love my home.

Now I have come back here. I wish I spent more time there.

I only have mom, dad, and bro. But that's enough. Chinese New Year is the time to gather with your family, no matter how small it is. After a year being far from home, I understand how precious a home is.

My home is...
... where I ate and slept and showered
... where I laughed and cried
... where I got angry and overjoyed
... where I studied and played
... where I watched TV and listened to radio
... where I phoned my besties and talked for hours
... where I spent time with my family

I don't know whether I can create a home that my mom and dad have created for me and bro. I am still in the dark, I don't know to where this life is gonna land, but I really wish that I can build a great home for my children in the future. I want them to be attached with their parents just like bro and I are attached to our home.

I was sorry that bro could only spend four days with us as he needed to rush back to his study. However, we had our best time together. I really love him, my only brother.

Now I have come back here, I miss my home even more. This place is not a home, this is just a hotel. I am a traveler and one day, I will be back home.

People get ready, get ready

Cause here it comes, it's a light

A beautiful light, over the horizon

Into our eyes

Oh, my my how beautiful

Oh my beautiful mother

She told me, son in life you're gonna go far

If you do it right, you'll love where you are

Just know, wherever you go

You can always come home

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~

Yesterday was my birthday, yes my 23rd birthday. I am grateful that I am still alive, as a whole, now.

I am getting older, yes, but people say age does not matter. As long as you are living your life fully and contributing yourself to others and the society, you can be 60 year old and feel like 20 inside. I believe I can be forever 20. Forever.

I received quite a number of birthday wishes. From my family, my besties, my junior high school friends, my bf. I refused to put my birthday in Facebook because I feel there is no point of getting birthday wishes from people who happen to look at the notification at right hand corner of the page. I feel more joy when I know certain people still remember my birthday.

I remember how I used to received birthday wishes through SMS. With my Nokia phone, I usually created one folder to contain those. When I felt lonely, I would open the folder and read through the messages and felt loved once more.

I have never been given a surprise party from my friends. Somehow and sometimes, I think about the pleasure that it will bring when your loved one storm into you and celebrate your birthday like they really mean it. I am longing for that kind of feeling. Even once is already satisfying for me.

The start of my 24th year on this world. I shall be better, I shall shine brighter, and I shall get wiser!

Sabbe Satta Bhavantu Sukitattha...

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~

On Skype
Me: Lagi apa?
Her: Lagi main pura-pura mati di ranjang

At the office
Me: (holding a black marker) Is this my marker?
OB: I have also.
Me: This is your marker or mine?
OB: I have marker, same same one.
Me: So this is yours?
OB: My one is blue.
Me: SO THIS IS MINE LAH! Alamak.

During training
Trainer: I always wake up very early, that's why after 5pm, my brain is on screen saver mode. So, my wife always tells me, at night do not talk...
Trainee: (while scribbling) ... to strangers...
Trainer: W!@#$%^&*()

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~

Two Zero One Two, a fruitful year indeed.

I never realize that dates keep passing and bring me to the end of the year in a glance. I can still remember how I spent my new year eve last year. I am so grateful that another year is coming and I hope it brings me more joy, more blessing, more smile.

I have gone through another year, I have become older by one year. This year journey is really a good one. With a lot of ups and downs, I wish I am wiser now.

Lesson 1
I learned that people were wearing their masks all the time, but the masks would sure be broken one time and I would get a chance to see the true colors. I should not be to naive to believe in people so easily and let them trap me in their spider web.

Lesson 2
You can't have ideal condition as what you wish. There is no such a thing as isolated environment. Everything is contributing to the causes and effects. There is no ideal boss, ideal colleagues, ideal boyfriend. All are purely one's expectation. So, perseverance is the key.

Lesson 3
Sometimes life push, pull, and twist you but you must still move on. I got a lot of stress throughout the year but I was finally here. One piece, as a whole.

Lesson 4
Friends are those who stay by you no matter what shape you are in. I have friends that value me, accept me for everything I am, and I am grateful for that. I am grateful for the technology that bring those far far away friends nearer to my heart.

Lesson 5
People may or may not see your hard work, but your heart knows everything. Therefore, keep performing the best and put your biggest effort for every single thing you do. You will fill the joyous bubbles when your heart rewards you for your hard works.

Lesson 6
Nobody in this world is up to no good. You are the one who should make your presence felt!

Earlier this year, I was so high tempered. I threw tantrum easily, I cried like a leaked pipe, I expected so much from everybody, I wanted everything to flow as what I wanted. Fortunately, I managed to control my expectation and got myself more calm. And surprisingly, I am much happier now.

Until mid of the year, I rarely exercise. I decided to change my lifestyle afterwards. Now I am a different girl with a healthy lifestyle.

Throughout this year, I learned a lot about my job. Sometimes I looked back and compare myself with Febrina a year ago and I could find so much difference. I am more into my job now, I have more understanding, and I dare to speak up more. I am so grateful that I had a chance to witness factory acceptance test of my tunnel boring machine and got priceless experience. I am grateful.

Now this is the time for me to think about my future. I am still in the dark. I don't know what I want and I don't know whether I am heading to the right direction. I need a compass.

Thanks Two Zero One Two! Thanks for equipping me with so many things inside my rucksack. I will continue my journey and meet your siblings out there. You will always be remembered and never forgotten.

Merci beaucoup!

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~

Her brain is like rojak, she mixed everything up...

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~

In the operating room, when I was about to get my head stitches
Me: *worried* Will you cut my hair?
Doctor: Do you think I am a barber?
Me: ...

Almost 11pm, when I was seeing my dentist
Nurse: Doc, X is coming now.
Doctor: What? What time is this now? Does she think I am a midnight sale?
Nurse: *speechless*

My sis-in-law was turning on the TV in his car
Niece: (to my dad) Yi gong, yi gong, ini film Harry Kotor. 
All: *burst out laughing*

Sometimes to think about funny and happy time can make you smile, even in your worst condition.

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~

I've known him since I was 15. I've been his good friend since I was 18. I went out with him since I was 19. And now I am 22.

Three years have passed! And it's another time to say, "Happy Anniversary, Baby!"

For all the laughter, all the tears... For all the joy, all the sadness... For all the quarrels, all the embraces... For all the smooth-sailing, all the rocky roads... For all the way these three years, I thank God, I thank the universe, I thank you...

There are so many things ahead of us, that we need to face... I believe we will walk hand in hand until the end of the world...

Do you remember that you said one lifetime would never be enough, and you wanted nine instead?

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~

In the middle of tense discussion,
OB: *bringing a tray of cups* Kopi, Sir?
Everyone: *staring at him unbelievably*

When he sent me to the airport,
OB: My wife hen many many...
Me: *thinking about 'hand' instead of 'hen'* Huh?
OB: Chicken, chicken...
Me: *bursting into laugh*
I was thinking that his wife had a lot of hands!!!!

I called him because there was a bee in my room,
Me: Hey, there's a bee!
OB: Bee? What?
Me: *googling a bee straightaway* This is bee...
OB: Ohhh, I know. My country have.
Me: Every country also have lah!
OB: I know this one honey, good!
Me: *looking at him* The honey is good, but not the bee!!!!!
Until now, the bee is still wandering happily and we could not catch it.

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~

One fine Saturday in the office
Contractor 1: Why you always work on Saturday?
Me: Hardworking ma?
Contractor 1: Go back, go back. Bye bye.
Me: ...

When I walked out of office, another one came into my way
Contractor 2: Why you always work? Never go out ah? You don't have boyfriend meh? Have, right?
Me: I am married to my job already.
Contractor: Aiyah, don't say like that lah. How old are you?
Me: 22.
Contractor: Oh, still okay la. But 24 must get married huh! Don't work so hard.
Me: ...

If I am that hardworking, none will say I am redundant.

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~

Saya memberikan bando kepada Kayra
Kay: Xie xie

Sesaat kemudian
Kay: Ii Fen Fen... *lari ke dalam kamar*
Me: *ngikut* Ya?
Kay: Ii Fen Fen, itu *sambil menunjuk kumpulan bando* itu punya Kaykay, taruh situ...
Me: Nanti kalo Kaykay ke mall, dipake ya... *naruh bandonya di tempat yang ditunjuk Kay*
Kay: Ii Fen Fen... Beli di mana?
Me: Di Xin Jia Po...
Kay: Kok itu doang? Tas nya mana?
Me: Tas apa???
Kay: Tas Barbie Kaykay...
Me: ... *Oemji dia nagih!!!!!*


Di mobil, hampir tiba di bandara
Me: Ray, ii pulang ke Xin Jia Po dulu ya...
Ray: Iya, ii di sana jangan nakal ya...
Me: ... *What???? Am I the one who is supposed to say that????*


Di mobil, Kay sedang main PSP
Kay: *menyodorkan PSP ke saya* Ii Fen Fen, ini mainya gimana?
Me: *bingung soalnya dr tadi dia main* Sini... Ini gini...
Kay: *mengalihkan perhatiannya ke benda lain*
Me: *akhirnya main PSP sendiri*


Kayra and Ray are so adorable!!!!

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~

When bf and I were queuing for a fully packed MRT,
Me: Eh, you tell them I am pregnant, so I can get a seat.
Bf: It's better if you tell them that your husband is pregnant, they will believe for sure. I look more pregnant than you.
Me: ... *speechless*

When I was inside the MRT,
Operator: Next station, Macpherson
A small kid: Why they name it Macpherson, not MacDonald? MacDonald is nicer.
Me: ... *trying not to laugh*

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~

Boss 1: So we should ask them to provide refreshments and newspapers from next week onward, right?
Admin: Yess, you should request for your beverages already...
Boss 2: No, in our specs, it's stated refreshment, not beverages...
Admin: What is the difference between beverages and refreshment???
Boss 2: Beverages means drinks only, like those milo or coffee... Refreshment includes dan gao (cakes), bing gan (crackers)...
Me: Bing gan only la, from where got dan gao?
Boss 2: And got kueh, keropok...
Boss 1: Yes, and got pau, siew mai...
Admin: *laughing very hard* Then send some to here lah!
Me: *speechless*

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~

Sometime ago during a meeting,

QP(S): You know, C922 D-wall cutter broke down... Until now, they still cannot fix it...
Boss: Who is their subcon???
Me: Tuksu
Boss: Oh, nevermind. Our subcon better. They will always su one.

And the whole room burst out laughing

I went to site that time,

Contractor 1: *talking to Contractor 2 in Korean*
Contractor 2: *looks surprised* *face me* Febrina, you need a chair?
Me: Huh? What?
Contractor 1: Bring umbrella also!
Me: Ehhhh? No no no!

I just realized Contractor 1 told Contractor 2 to bring a chair so I could sit, ON SITE. What the hell. Hahaha.

In the MRT,

Train announcement: Lorong Chuan
Bf: I think I want to live here, people always cuan one...
Me: ...

Eh, actually there are so many terrace houses and condominiums around Lorong Chuan. Maybe he is true.

A lunch at Sakae Sushi,

Boss 1: *talking to Boss 1* So, this is for you. Finish up.
Boss 2: *facing me* Febrina, you are the youngest. Eat.
Me: Whattttt????

And I ended up feeling so full of sushi.

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~

Yesterday I attended this so called 'career talk' for undergraduate students. Yes, I have graduated, but my director asked me to go there and support him. He said I might be a good model for the students. Oh, yes, okay, whatever.

The event was yesterday, and he informed me YESTERDAY, 3 hours before the event. I didn't prepare myself, event the slightest.

I WORE POLO TEE + JEANS + SPORT SHOES!!!

And I was supposed to be a good model for the students.

I was like, "What???? Are you serious????"

But, bo pien hor. I went there, and not unexpectedly, people misunderstood me as a student that came to attend the career talk instead of an engineer that came to share with the students.

Sigh.

Paiseh, paiseh.

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~

When I was reviewing contractor's report template

Me: I think it's quite good already, but you still need to add bla bla bla bla *keep adding things to be included*
Contractor: Hmm *nod*
Me: And this one, very unclear. Did you draw it by hand?
Contractor: No, it's not.
Me: But it's not clear. Can you just use solid circle?
Contractor: But it's donut shape.
Me: But it's not clear.
Contractor: But I like donut!
Me: *burst out laughing*

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~

After a presentation, all of us were waiting for the lift.

*Ding*
Listening to the sound, my boss and I quickly rushed into the lift with my contractor team.
But I just realized that the PM hadn't get into the lift yet.
Me: Ehhh, the PM!!!
Contractor 1: *already push the close button*
Contractor 2: It's okay...
Boss: Eh, he hasn't come in yet...
Contractor 1: My PM?
Me: Yesss...
Contractor 1: Oh, nevermind. I thought it's your PM. *looks very relieved*
Me: ...
Boss: Later your boss say: your salary also nevermind!

LOL! At least there's some entertainment in the office.

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~