Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Next Station: CHANGI AIRPORT

Just wanna say...

"INDONESIA, I'M COMING BACK!!!"

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~
Read Comments

LOVE is all that I can give to you

Before I forgot about this. Let me share what I learned from COM201. Actually, what I learned wasn't just this theory. I learned a lot, but this one implied the real situation that we faced most of the day.

What is it?
It's about...

...

...

...

Love relationship.

Yeah, I studied about interpersonal relationship and love relationship was one of the content. Actually I wanted to share this since long long time ago, when I first heard about this, but I had no time to write, or, well, I was just lazy.

Love. Everyday we hear about love. You listen to a song and you catch a love in it. You go to a movie and you see love inside. Or just, you go to canteen and see two persons, girl and boy, you will say that they are probably in love with each other. But, do you know what the definition of love is?

If you go to here or here, you will find a bunch of explanations about love. But, I will not talk about it here. You can read it by yourself, huh? haha.

Based on the Love Triangle Theory, love contains three aspects that can't be separated: intimacy, passion, and commitment. Then, without one or more of them, it is just an incomplete love.

Love relationship can be categorized to three stages. First, escalation stage. Second, navigation stage. And third, the deterioration stage.

Escalation stage

This stage can be further categorized into six substages:

1. People don't interact with each other
In this stage, one hasn't found his future partner. They are seeking and they are wondering how they will look like and participate in a relationship.

2. Invitational communication
One has found his 'target'. In this stage, people will disclose each other securely, but what they say will contain more relational than content meaning. For example, "Do you like action movie?" can be interpreted as, "Do you want to go on a date with me?" and a response, "Yes, I like it very much!" may mean "I am available and attracted to you. How about you?". So, Guys, a lot of misunderstandings rise up in this stage. Then, you should be careful with your words.

3. Explorational communication
One starts to seek similarity between him and his partner. They disclose even further in this stage. They SMS to each other all day long, they call each other for hours just to find that they are somehow connected, and they start to show trust by sharing embarassing stories. 

4. Intensifying communication
In this stage, they can be seen together most of the time. Most of them just share time together but do nothing. For couple in this stage, they see togetherness as very important and they must be connected to each other whatsoever. Sometimes, they do idealizing to their partners. The perfect one, it's how they see each other, and unfortunately, they deny the flaws of their partners.

5. Revising communication
The couple starts to finds conflicts inside their relationship. They get back from the 'love euphoria' and start to face the reality. They talk about the strengths and the problems in their relationship, they seek possibilities for further relationship.

6. Intimate bonding
This is the stage where past and present experiences transform to future expectation. Partners adjust to each other's life and share a commitment. They decide to work on the relationship.

Navigation stage

This stage is just an extent of intimate bonding stage. They find new problems, revisit old ones, and prevent future problems. They get deeper and deeper into each other's life and heart.

Deterioration stage

1. Intraphysics phase
One starts to find that the relationship has some problems. Maybe they spend very little time together, or even, they share activities too frequently. They, then, wil feel some dissapointments to their partners.

2. Dyadic phase
In this stage, couple have two options. They can resolve the problems or they want to ignore it and breakup as the result. If they resolve it, the relationship go back to intimate bonding stage. 

3. Social support process
If couple choose to break up their relationship, they will go to this stage. This stage is all about how people explain their breakup to the world. Usually, they seek help from their family members or friends to raise them up again.

4. Grave dressing process
In this process, couple will understand fully that the relationship can't be saved already. Maybe they still cannot accept the reality, but they understand.

5. Resurrection process
They restart their new life

Yeah, so that is the model of love relationship. We don't need to go through each stage, though. We can skip some parts, and go back to some parts. It's flexible.

Huaaah, so hard to dig again the thing I forgot already.
Hope you like my information.

Love.
Love.
Love.

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~
Read Comments

New layout, new spirit, new life

Welcome to my new home^^

I decided to change my blog layout. I have made this decision (haha, decision, looks like this is a very important matter - lebai) since long long time ago, but I had no time to do it. Quiz here and there, this and that ECA, and of course, my laziness, prevent me from doing so.

And after I have been free enough to play with my world, I spent so many hours to search the layout fitted me, try to put it on my blog, fail, search again, attempt again, fail again, and it happened several times until I finally found someone, someone to share my life, I finally found the one, to be with every night. Oh, of course, that part was just my lebainess. I finally found this layout. Grey. Simple. But appealing.

This one is actually a wordpress layout that someone converted into blogger. Yep, that's right. That's why my blog looks like a wordpress blog now. Haha. I like it though.

I hope I will not get bored with this one, because it's really tiring to change all the things and start from the very beginning, for the gadget, I mean.

Yeah, and now, I officially open my new home for everyone. *clap,clap,clap
Or I need to say, "You may turn over the exam question paper now and start writing!"?
Muahahaha.

Once again, welcome. Hope you like and visit me frequently.^^

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~
Read Comments

Sunday, November 23, 2008

I'll sip the taste, I'm sure...

I keep starring, over and over, I keep gazing. I found myself inside my fear, my negative thought, my courage. I found myself swimming alone in the wide wide ocean and I lost my way. Geez, what on earth am I doing now?

I am sitting here, feel like giving up, but my concious self told me, "It's too late to give up, you have come until this far."

Yep.
It's too late. I have chosen my path and I have to be responsible.

I'll take all the risk, I'll feel all the pain, I'll enjoy all the burden, I'll laugh with the tears, and at the end of day, I'll sip the taste of happiness.

Malaikat juga tau siapa yang jadi juaranya...

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~
Read Comments

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Catatan dua puluh november ketika (sekali lagi) saya teringat rumah

Tiba-tiba teringat rumah, bagaimana saya keluyuran ke sana ke mari kalau sedang bosan, capek, suntuk belajar. Tiba-tiba teringat rumah, bagaimana mama tetap mengatur asupan gizi saya di tengah masa-masa sulit seperti ulangan semester atau tes masuk NTU. Tiba-tiba teringat rumah, bagaimana saya menghampiri papa di ruang kerjanya, sekadar ngobrol-ngobrol atau duduk-duduk tak tentu arah. Kembali saya teringat rumah, bagaimana saya numpang rebahan di kamar dedek, menonton dia main playstation.

Teringat rumah.
Teringat rumah.
Teringat rumah.

Yang ada di kepala saya selain subject-subject yang examable tak lain dan tak bukan adalah rumah.

Yah, apalagi kalau sedang belajar begini. Bosan. Suntuk. Ngantuk. Capek. Mau keluyuran seperti di rumah? Keluyuran ke mana, kamar cuma 3mX3m. Mau mengharapkan asupan gizi yang sehat dan seimbang? Ga ada mama. Mau cari teman ngobrol? Siapa? Ga ada papa. Semuanya lagi sibuk exam. Bahkan MSN pun tak online. Atau, mau nonton orang main playstation? Boro-boro playstation, TV aja ngga ada. Ga ada dedek.

I wish I could skip these five days and find myself inside the aeroplane bringing me back home. Yeah, I wish. But I can't skip actually.

Haha.
Besok soil mechanics. Pelajaran yang paling saya suka sekaligus yang paling menguras energi. Saya suka, karena pelajarannya ga abstrak. Jelas tujuannya. Tapi susah. Sungguh dilema.

Soil Mechanics membuat saya sakit kepala. Bukan, bukan sakit kepala dalam artian konotasi, tapi benar-benar sakit kepala. Saya butuh bantuan Panadol malam ini nampaknya.

Yeah, cukup sudah bloggingnya. Awan di luar jendela saya sudah mulai kehitam-hitaman, suram. Cepat juga jam yang tik-tak-tik-tak ini berdetak, sampai saya tak sadar kalau waktu saya untuk belajar semakin sempit.

Saya harus mempercepat langkah. Saya dikejar waktu.

Tidak apa-apa dikejar waktu, asal jangan mengejar waktu.
U're still in front.

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~
Read Comments

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Should we feel ashamed?


Friendship...
Friendship...
Friendship...

What is friendship?

Friendship is happiness...
Friendship is sweet...
Friendship is smile...
Friendship is laughter...

Not really true...

Friendship is...

this...

The dog is trying to wake his dead 'friend' up


He is trying to move his 'friend' dead body to sideway, barking to anyone wants to help. He doesn't want anybody to touch his 'friend'

Even a dog knows what the meaning of friendship is...

So, should we feel ashamed of ourselves?

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~


Read Comments

I'm in the middle of my way home...

Yes, half of my papers are done.
I don't care what the result will be. Ok, not really don't care. At least, now, I don't care about the result. The time for me to worry bout the exam result things will come at the right time. Yes, at the right time. Sesuatu ada waktunya masing-masing, yep.

I just finished my MoM paper. Yeap, my bloody 4-AU paper after another scary 4-AU paper yesterday. 

And tomorrow will be Fluid mechanics.

Somehow, I have no mood to study now. I don't know from which part I should start studying. Then, I end up blogwalking and facebooking.
Kebiasaan lama. Tak bisa berubah.

I think about home more than usual recently.
Usually, I thought about home all day long, and now, I even dream about home. 
Muahahaha.

I cannot help waiting for 25th November 2008...

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~
Read Comments

Friday, November 14, 2008

Saya tak suka, tapi saya masih harus menjalaninya *sigh

Exam is in the air!!!
Yow, exam sedang merajalela, menjajah kebebasan kita untuk menikmati dunia, atau bahkan, untuk menikmati tidur.

Jadi, berhubung topik exam sedang hangat-hangatnya. Dan saya, yang sepertinya gagal mendapatkan nilai bagus di exam pertama, juga bakalan ngomongin tentang exam. Againnnn? Yes, again, since nothing can't be pushed inside my brain for this period, except exam. Lol.

Di post saya yang satu ini, saya udah pernah menyatakan ketidaksukaan saya terhadap exam. Dan kali ini, saya akan kembali mengulangi pernyataan saya.

Jauh di lubuk hati saya, walaupun saya sekarang masih selalu ngiasu sebelum exam (karena saya takut ga bisa sementara orang lain bisa), saya ga setuju dengan yang namanya exam. Apa sih artinya exam? Buat apa kita belajar kalo belajarnya cuma sebelum exam?

Setuju ga sih kalo sebenernya exam itu ga tepat buat dijadiin estimator pemahaman siswa tentang apa yang udah mereka pelajarin selama kurun waktu tertentu? Bagi saya, exam itu estimator yang sangat bias dan ga akurat. Kenapa?

Pertama, nilai yang dihasilkan oleh siswa yang bener-bener belajar selama satu semester dibandingkan siswa yang belajar 1 malem bisa jadi sama. Bahkan, siswa yang belajar satu malem bisa jadi dapet nilai lebih gede. Jadi, apa gunanya nilai exam kalo ga bisa membedakan siswa yang bener-bener belajar dan siswa yang hanya sekadar 'belajar'?

Kedua, faktor hoki alias keberuntungan bisa sangat mempengaruhi jalannya exam. Siswa yang cuma belajar satu hari dan kebetulan mempelajari bagian-bagian yang tepat bisa dapet nilai setara dengan siswa yang mempelajari keseluruhan materi. Jadi, apa gunanya nilai exam kalo ga bisa membedakan siswa mana yang bener-bener bisa dan siswa mana yang kebetulan hoki?

Ketiga, nilai sebuah pemahaman ngga cuma ada di exam, kan? Seorang siswa yang paham, bisa mengerjakan soal dengan baik. Seorang siswa yang paham bagaimana langkah kerja soal tipe ini dan soal tipe itu juga akan bisa mengerjakan dengan baik. Ga ada bedanya. Padahal kalau di luar konteks exam, dua orang itu akan jadi beda. Jadi, apa gunanya exam kalo ga bisa membedakan siswa mana yang bener-bener paham dan siswa mana yang cuma bisa menghapal?

Keempat, mungkin aja ada siswa tertentu yang ga cocok sama tekanan exam. Sebenernya dia paham dan ngerti betul apa yang dia pelajarin selama satu semester, tapi dia gugupan. Jadi, ketika kakinya menjejak exam hall dan tengkuknya mulai ditiup oleh udara air-con yang tak berperikemanusiaan, apa yang udah dia pahami tiba-tiba buyar. Atau mungkin, dia orangnya terlalu detail dan ga bisa bekerja dengan cepat, jadi ga selesai mengerjakan. Bisa jadi begini, bisa jadi begitu. Yang jelas, exam bukan estimator yang baik. Exam ga bisa membedakan.


Saya udah pernah bilang kalau saya lebih setuju assignment daripada exam. Assignment lebih menuntut kita untuk mengerti, untuk menghayati, untuk menyelam lebih jauh, untuk menggali lebih dalam, untuk apapun itu lah namanya. Yang jelas, assignment dan project menuntut pemahaman yang lebih, yang ga bisa dituntut oleh exam.

Saya lebih setuju kalo di akhir setiap subjek, siswa punya sebuah project, yang nyata, yang konkret, aplikasi dari apa yang mereka pelajari selama satu semester. Lebih sibuk mungkin, tapi lebih paham.
Itu kan gunanya sekolah, belajar, dan belajar?
Supaya paham.
Supaya bisa berguna untuk dunia.

Kuliah pun ternyata masih abstrak.
>.<

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~
Read Comments

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Saksi kekejaman exam, Saya

0600, saya bangun, keluar, langit masih gelap, tak tampak tanda-tanda kehidupan

0800, saya keluar, ke toilet, mulai tampak orang-orang berjalan ke arah SRC sambil membaca notes, saya ikut deg-degan

0900, saya keluar, nyuci gelas, makin banyak orang-orang lewat di bawah sana, hati saya ikut berdebar tak karuan

1000, saya keluar, mandi, sunyi senyap, tak ada tanda-tanda kehidupan lagi

1100, saya keluar, ke toilet, satu dua orang mulai berjalan ke arah canteen 2 sambil membaca (dan menggigit) kertas ujian, saya bertanya-tanya gimana exam mereka

1130, saya keluar, tapau makanan, semua orang keluar dan berjalan ke arah canteen 2, ramai

1200, saya balik ke kamar, lewat MPH, anak postgrad sedang ujian, lagi-lagi saya deg-degan

1300, saya keluar, buang sampah, kembali banyak orang berjalan ke arah SRC, siap bertempur lagi, dan hati saya lompat-lompat lagi

1500, saya keluar, ke toilet, arus balik kembali terjadi

1630, saya keluar, hujan, dan manusia-manusia dengan buku-bukunya berjalan lagi ke SRC, saya makin takut mau exam

Guess, 1900 nanti, saya keluar, dan mendapati arus kembali berbalik ke arah canteen 2

Hidup dikelilingi exam halls...
Nasib... Nasib...

U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~

*15 jam sebelum paper pertama, masih ngeblog*
Read Comments