And when I woke up...
You know what it felt?
It hurt...
Just like last year, last month, the day before yesterday, yesterday, and maybe tomorrow, the day after tomorrow, next month, or even next year...
U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~
Friday, October 31, 2008
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Satu tubuh, seribu satu keajaiban
Seorang ibu adalah business investor yang paling hebat
Ia tau bagaimana menanamkan investasi dalam diri anak-anaknya
Walaupun bukan dirinya yang menikmati hasilnya
Seorang ibu adalah guru yang paling hebat
Ia tau bagaimana cara mendidik buah hatinya
Walaupun nantinya tak ada sedikitpun ucapan terimakasih dari anaknya
Seorang ibu adalah event organizer yang paling hebat
Ia tau bagaimana membuat hari-hari dalam keluarganya selalu berwarna
Walaupun tak jarang anak-anak lebih suka pergi bersama teman-temannya
Seorang ibu adalah akuntan yang paling hebat
Ia tau bagaimana cara yang tepat menghindari defisit dalam buku besarnya
Walaupun anak-anaknya selalu menggerutu bahwa ibu mereka pelit
Seorang ibu adalah ekonom yang paling hebat
Ia tau bagaimana cara menghadapi resesi dalam keuangan keluarganya
Walaupun lagi-lagi anak-anaknya akan mengatainya pelit
Seorang ibu adalah juru masak yang paling hebat
Ia tau apa yang harus dimasak hari ini, besok, lusa, bahkan tahun depan
Walaupun seringkali suami dan anaknya tak menghabiskan apa yang ia hidangkan
Seorang ibu adalah ahli gizi yang paling hebat
Ia tau apa saja yang baik dan tak baik dikonsumsi oleh keluarganya
Walaupun anak-anaknya sering mengomel karena larangan-larangannya
Seorang ibu adalah dokter yang paling hebat
Ia tau pasti apa yang harus dilakukan ketika keluarganya menderita sakit, hati maupun fisik
Walaupun kadang-kadang keluarganya tak percaya dengan 'resep' yang ia berikan
Seorang ibu adalah duta perdamaian yang paling hebat
Ia tau bagaimana menentramkan perselisihan di antara anak-anaknya
Walaupun keesokan harinya mereka akan kembali pada perselisihan yang sama
Seorang ibu adalah pengacara yang paling hebat
Ia tau bagaimana membela anak-anaknya ketika mereka difitnah
Walaupun si anak terkadang malu ibunya ikut campur
Seorang ibu adalah hakim yang paling hebat
Ia tau bagaimana mengajar anak-anaknya ketika mereka melakukan kesalahan
Walaupun terkadang anak-anaknya malah lari dari tanggung jawab
Seorang ibu adalah supporter yang paling hebat
Ia tau bagaiman cara mendukung suami dan anak-anaknya ketika mereka jatuh
Walaupun mereka melupakan jasanya ketika mereka sudah bahagia
Seorang ibu adalah atlet yang paling hebat
Ia tau bagaimana cara menggunakan energinya dari pagi buta hingga seluruh keluarganya tertidur
Walaupun tak pernah sekalipun anak-anaknya memberikan ucapan selamat pagi atau ciuman selamat malam
Seorang ibu adalah aktris yang paling hebat
Ia tau bagaiman harus tersenyum dan terlihat bahagia demi keluarganya
Demi suami dan anak-anaknya
Demi cintanya
Walaupun sudah sebanyak itu kesalahan-kesalahan kita kepadanya
Walaupun sudah sebanyak apa air mata yang ia teteskan karena kita
Walalupun sudah seringkih apa tubuhnya
Ia tetap tersenyum
Karena
Seorang ibu
Adalah keajaiban
U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~
Monday, October 27, 2008
Perasaan itu, masih sama seperti dulu
Perasaan yang sama. Ya, persis sama. Selalu itu yang aku rasakan setiap kali mengingat dirimu, melihat kau sign-in dari MSNmu, dan membuka-buka friendster page-mu. Perasaan yang sama selalu muncul, seperti tak akan pernah lepas dariku, hingga akhir hayatku.
Perasaan itu...
Sakit.
Benar-benar sakit.
U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~
It's FUNTASTIC!!!!
Hhhhh, she is so pretty...I'm a big fan of her..
Oooppss... I am a BIG FAN of her...
Muahahhaa...
How can she be that cute and pretty and awesome and adorable, huh?
Yup, she is Vanessa Hudgens, an actress and also a singer... She started her career in 2003 and became more famous after being Gabriella in Disney's High School Musical...
She began her music career in 2005 by releasing her debut album: V...
Guess, she is just 20 this year but she looks that mature... Wow... Fabulous...
And I wonder where she got that sexy skin color, that very black hair, and that sharp eyes... Now I know that she got it from his Irish and and native America father and Filipino, Chinese, and Spanish mother... She is really a great mix, huh?
Ok, stop talking about Vanessa... Now I want to stress that High School Musical is FABULOUS!!! Yep, a mixture between a drama and songs... It brought up an ordinary school life, about theatre, about basketball, about love, and also about friendship...
I am not going to give you any synopsis or something since my blog never talked about synopsis ro review or something like that... I
just want to say, it's great... Hehe... Disney has done a good job...
Some says it is just a childish movie... Yeah, it's childish, but sometimes we need to be childish to enjoy this world... Sometimes we need to pull ourselves from the 'real' world and enjoy everything as if we are still children...
I stole some of my hectic time to watch this... I said it early, anything happens, I'll watch and I watched it... Muahahaha...
Sure, I encourage you all to watch... Let's sing together...
High school doesn't seem to be forever...
Lalala~
U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~
P.S. I miss my high school time althoug it didn't seem as wonderful as Troy and Gabriella's... >.<
Saturday, October 25, 2008
Lagi-lagi masalah mulut
Saya heran kenapa kebanyakan orang ga bisa meng-acknowledge perasaan orang lain. Saya belajar di COM201 bahwa ada 3 tahap dalam menciptakan communication climate yang confirming, yaitu recognition, acknowledgement, dan endorsement. Recognition berkaitan dengan sapaan. Kita menyapa, kita menyadari bahwa orang lain exist, dan kita berusaha membangun communication climate. Sementara, endorsement adalah tahap di mana kita bisa menerima pendapat orang lain sepenuhnya. Menerima bukan berarti setuju. Kita menerima bahwa point of view orang lain beda dengan point of view kita dan kita menghargainya. Kita ga ngajak dia berantem karena pendapatnya beda sama kita.
Ya, ga usah jauh-jauh ke endorsement, kita bicara soal acknowledgement aja. Jangankan meng-endorse orang lain, meng-acknowledge aja banyak orang masih ga becus. Kita gagal meng-acknowledge orang ketika kita ga mendengarkan orang lain ngomong dan ketika kita ga memikirkan perasaan orang lain saat dia ngomong. Contohnya aja, saat orang lain lagi ngomong, kita dengan sengaja membuat dia kehilangan muka. Kalo istilahnya orang Palembang, 'nyampai'.
Saya ga suka ketika saya sampe kehilangan muka karena orang lain 'nyampai' saya, dan sebisa mungkin saya meng-acknowledge perasaan orang lain. Saya berusaha sebisa mungkin buat menanggapi apa yang orang lain omongin sama saya. Segimanapun ngga nyambungnya saya, saya tetap menanggapi apa yang orang omongin ke saya, seengganya saya tersenyum.
Tapi, sering banget orang lain ngga meng-acknowledge saya. Mereka ga mikir gimana sakitnya ketika saya ngomong, mereka malah mempermalukan saya dengan tindakan mereka, verbal maupun nonverbal. Mereka ga respon apa-apa, tanpa ekspresi apa-apa. Di kesempatan lainnya, mereka memutarbalikkan apa yang saya katakan, membuat saya kehilangan muka. Kadang-kadang, mereka menunjukkan facial expression yang bener-bener ignoring. Saya langsung menyesal saat itu juga ketika saya sadar saya hanya membuang dan menginjak-injak muka saya sendiri. Saya menyesal pernah membuka mulut saya. Saya menyesal udah membangun communication climate dengan orang-orang ini.
Beberapa hari yang lalu, saya, sekali lagi, di-acknowledge dengan cara yang benar-benar ga terhormat. Hanya dengan beberapa detik kata-kata dan facial expression yang benar-benar irritating, saya merasa terbanting. Ga perlu saya ceritakan. Saya cuma mau bilang, mikir-mikir dulu kalo mau ngomong atau membalas omongan orang lain. Jangan sampe orang-orang lain jadi korban juga. Mungkin bagi kamu itu lucu, tapi mikir dulu, Mas, kalo kamu lagi ada si posisi yang 'diserang', kamu akan tetep ngerasa itu lucu ngga?
Kita berusaha menciptakan communication climate, yang tentunya confirming... Jadi, mikir dulu sebelum ngapa-ngapain. Keh?
U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~
26th January 2007
26th January 2007
An unforgetable day
For me, for my third grade high school classmates, and of course, for Leedwin
I was reading all unread posts I haven't read in my FS group... And I remembered one thing when it came to the post Leedwin posted...
Check this out...
Temen2ku tercinta�.. hoho�I just copied and pasted it here... It remained the same and original, fresh from the oven (hmm, not really, because it's been nearly two years =P), from Leedwin...
Aq dak tw nak ngo apo lagi� Thx nn e� baek nn kalian ne galonyo.. XII p2..
The Oksida.. kompak nean.. aq dak tw lagi nak cak mano tadi tu kalo dak ado kalian2 yg Bantu aq� tahan keluar pas jam pelajran� Tahan keno marah amo Pak Kasdi.. ampe pak kasdi ngo.. kalian mau di hukum atau keluar kelas� kalian galonyo keluar.. cuman sekitar 7 uong di kelas tadi.. seluruhnyo la di lapangan bola galo.. terharu nn aq tadi�
Agung na yg biaso diem biso ampe ngorek2 rumput kaget nn aq.. katonyo ampe cak nanem padi.. thx nn yoh gung.. trus demut.. pake acara maeni batang ampe nyari2 sibuk nn.. thx yoh ketuo kelas.. trus achmed.. ampe jgk2 got.. ngorek2� thx nn e� dgn abed jg.. sibuk nn ngorek2 comberan� ampe tangannyo kotor galo e.. sorry e.. thx nn tapi� seneng nn aq punyo temen cak kalian.. trus febrina,,, masuk2 ampe ke kelas2.. sibuk jg febrina tadi dgn valent..,, lisa jg.. merin� seluruhnyo.. yg la bantu nyari khususnyo shinta yg dr awal muter2 lapangan.. trus charles cupes diowong.. seru tanyo cak mano tadi aq lari nyo.., rute lari... Aq dak nyangko kalian baek galo.. Mungkin bagi kalian ah.. cuman �jepitan� untuk apo di cari.. tapi kalian semua baek2 galo.. nyarike galo... yetty jg... dico... ampe sibuk jg nyari.. yg paling semangat.. td tu sedi nn aq.. liat kalian2 galonyo baek2 galo dgn aq.. seneng nn rasonyo dak tw lagi la nka ngo apo ttg kalian.. oh yo aq ampir lupo.. Wewe... ampe nak panggil �ipo� cak paranormal cak tu e.. klo di pikir2 geli jg.. thx nn we e... la susah2 nelpon... tapi dak masuk e?? Hwhw.. dpp la.. thx nn lah.. liat kalian galonyo... skrg be masi teringet2 aq.. ternyata kelas XIIP2 uongny baek2.. solidaritasny tinggi.. semuanyo............. aq dak biso sebuti satu per satu... thx 4 all... yg namonyo dak kusebuti thx nn e.. pokoknyo thx lah.........Thx nn e... dak ado kato2 lagi aq selain Terima kasih dgn kalian galonyo.... thx nn.... Friend 4 eva.. okey??
Keep in touch ok?
Yep, maybe most of you didn't understand what she talked about, or just simply you didn't know what language she was using...
Haha, it's Palembang language, and she talked about The Oksida's great effort to help her...
Now, I'll try to retell what happened that day...
26th January 2007... It was Friday, and if I'm not mistaken, we had Art class at the first and second slots in our timetable... Like usual, we always did some mess whenever art class was coming, maybe because of Mr. JM who was too kind, too patient, too good for our class... Haha...
And that day, one of my friend, Leedwin, came late to school... She didn't attend the first two hour class because of her lateness... She had to do the punishment... Yeah, a punishment with a big bunch of people that also arrived after the gate had been closed... They had to run around the football yard... The size of the football court wasn't like the one in stadium, but, believe me, it's tiring... Haha...
She joined us, if my memory is still good, nearly in the end of art class... She still chit-chatted for a while before the bell rang to transfer all of us into the second class... I forgot what class we should have had at that time, but I think the teacher didn't show up or something, so that all of us being more and more crazy: move here and there to 'socialize' (read: gossip) with others, sang together, and created some noise... Ooh, I really missed those times... >.<
Then, Leedwin realized that her hairpin was missing... She started to become very worry, and at last, you can guess, she cried... And after that, most of us noticed that something was wrong with her, gathered around her, and started kaypoh-ing...
That hairpin was very precious to her... It was from her mom, that had gone to heaven, and it was the last present she gave to Leedwin...
Some of my friends started to join her crying, some looked very worry, and some didn't care... We started to ask her the punishment route, whether she remembered anything about the hairpin, etc, etc... I can only say that we started to feel very 'Sherlock Holmes' that day... Haha...
And, we decided to go out and try to find it around the school... Actually, it could drop everywhere around the school, and the school was not small (at least, before I saw NTU)... And, disregarding thoseimpossibilities to find the hairpin, we still wanted to fight...
When we were about to leave the class, Mr. Kasdi came and confront us... He gave us choice whether we wanted to be punished or we insisted on going out in study time...
Whooolaaa... Most of us went out and left around seven people whom I didn't remember... We went to the football court, circled it, and tried to find the pin... Some looked inside the drainage path... We went here and there... Valent and I even went into Kantor Kesiswaan, asked the data od late students that day, went into classes, asked permission from the teachers inside, and informed about this lost precious hairpin... We thought that someone might be taking it if they saw it lying on the ground...
And then, the first break time bell rang... We felt very hopeless... But, we still tried... We couldn't help seeing Leedwin cry all the way... I went to Tata Usaha, used a little part of my authority as OSIS committee, I announced through the speakers about this... I hoped that the power of chain message would affect more or less... Anyone heard about this might ask and inform other and hopefully we could find the little guy...
And at last, after a long lasting search, we finally found it...
It was with Delia... She found it when they were doing the punishment... She asked some people about the thing, but noone knew... Unfortunately, she didn't ask Leedwin...
Hehe...
And the story ended happily ever after...
The day is very unforgetable...
Moral of the story:
1. It's very happy if we can help others
2. Sometimes breaking the rules is not a bad thing
3. A little act of kindness goes a long way (^_-)
4. Don't come late to school or you will lose your hairpin (lol)
Waaah, I really missed those high school days, with the same dress everyday, the same class, the same teachers, the same classes... I miss my high school time... It's irreplacable...^^
Bravo...
The Oksida (The Orang-Orang Keren Dua Belas IPA Dua)...
U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~
P.S. Time for High School Musical...^^
Friday, October 24, 2008
Lupa
Baru 2 jam yang lalu saya bertekad ga akan buka facebook dan blogwalking dan tekad saya masih terlihat jelas di postingan saya di bawah... Tapi, tapi, tapi, saya baru aja melakukan pelanggaran luar biasa terhadap apa yang saya tekadkan alias menjilat ludah sendiri... Saya udah blogwalk dan kepo baca-baca blog orang... Parrrraaaaahhhh nya saya...
Hahaha...
Akhirnya saya memutuskan untuk blogging saja...
Sebenernya akhir-akhir ini keinginan untuk blogging sering banget muncul, tapi sayangnya, hasrat itu munculnya di saat yang ngga tepat... Saat saya lagi mandi lah, nunggu bus lah, makan lah, atau saat saya lagi di kelas... Dan saat saya udah duduk di depan komputer, mood ngeblognya udah melayang-layang tinggi dan tak bisa lagi digapai... Alhasil, blog ini jadi ga punya isi deh belakangan ini... Haha...
Tuh kan...
Again...
Saya sekarang lagi lupa apa yang mau saya tulisin di sini...
Parah deh...
U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~
And I will be fully consolidated
To be honest, until today, this minute, this second, this time, I haven't remembered all my venues for my classes. I still kept forgetting which tutorial room I should have gone Tuesday after my lunch, or Thursday after my COM 201 class, or Wednesday after my lab session. I still kept forgetting where I should have turned, right or left, after I finished my tutorial class and wanted to go to another class. I haven't remembered at all and it looks like I will end my third semester very soon. Is it the semester that walks too fast or is it just me whose brain is not that big? Lol.
Oh my, I cannot descripe my feeling right now. I am happy because in one month time I will sit on a cozy sofa in my home, giggle on phone with my old friends, and watch any TV channel I want, but, on the other hand, I feel really scared about exam. Yeah, exam. Exam, exam, and exam. And before exam's coming, I still have five quizzes waiting for me.
I have no time to start preparing for the exam since all the quizzes need my attention. Omigod, I think I couldn't understand what all the lecturers taught after recess and I forgot about all the lecturers taught before recess. Tuink. What the hell am I doing here? Just forgetting things, even the important one????
And another reason I couldn't start my exam preparation is that my commitment to other-than-studying things. I have this meeting, that event, this work, that work, and a bunch of between-important-and-unimportant things. Huhu.
I'm stressed out. Too much pressure.
Just recall my conversation through MSN with Ahin. I said that civil engineering was too tough and too stressful. All the things we study in this field is stresses. All about stresses. Stress, stress, and stress. Shear stress, normal stress, this stress, and that stress. MoM of course talked about stress all the way: force and stress, stress and force. Soil mechanics also brought up 'stress' in avery lecture. Effective vertical stress, pore water pressure (note, pressure is stress), and stress will cause consolidation. And guess, I really became stressed out because of this stresses. Lol.
"Too much stress. We will be consolidated very soon," I said.
And Ahin asked me, "When will be the swelling?"
"Of course," I replied, "When the stress is unload, holiday. Haha."
And I will be fully consolidated asap...
U're the best I've ever had
P.S.
Things to do :
1. STUDY!!!!
2. Watch High School Musical (should I???)
Things not to do:
1. Kaypoh through Facebook
2. Blogwalk
3. Worry too much
Thursday, October 23, 2008
You will shine...
This post is dedicated to my 'dedek"...
Yep, my 'dedek', my very very very handsome and cool brother...
Muahaha... *I'm 'lebay' though
Then, in the shortage of time I have, I steal some time to post this...
Congratulation to my lovely brother for being elected as Ketua 1 OSIS/PPSK SMA Xaverius 1 Palembang...
I knew you would shine, and now you have started to show your existance and credibility...
I hope you can be more and more mature, more and more responsible, more and more wise, more and more fluent in public speaking, and I hope you can find who you are and how you have to be...
Love and miss you always...
U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~
Sunday, October 19, 2008
You are the music in me^^
I was doing blogwalking when I found this... This quiz is in my friend, Vivien's, blog... She said she took this from Uti and now I took it from her... Lol...
So, before moving to Probability n Statistics, let me play for a while...
^^
RULES:
1. Put your music player on shuffle.
2. Press forward for each question.
3. Use the song title as the answer to the question even if it doesn't make sense.
ABSOLUTELY NO CHEATING PLEASE!
1. How are you feeling today?
~ Tidur - Dewi Dee Lestari (I'm lack of sleep actually... Lol...)
2.Will you get far in life?
~ Somewhere Over The Rainbow - Connie Talbot (It means, "Yes, I will"?)
3. How do your friends see you?
~ Di Atas Normal - Peterpan (Now, I know they see me as an abnormal person... Muahahaha...)
4. Will you get married?
~ Back to Heaven's Light - Dewi Dee Lestari (Errr, does it mean I probably will not get married??? Nooooo...)
5. What is your best friend's theme song?
~ Langit Tak Mendengar - Peterpan (Eh, why my playlist keep choosing Dee n Peterpan's songs???)
6. What is the story of your life?
~ Bukan Lagu Cinta - Marcell (Yeah, my life is sure not full of love... >.<)
7. What was high school like?
~ Have You Ever - Westlife (Yes, I have!!! =P)
8. How can you get ahead in life?
~ When I'm With You - Westlife (Who is the 'you', by the way?)
9. What is the best thing about your friends?
~ Pacar Sementara - QTA (What does it mean??? Errr...)
10. What is today going to be like?
~ A Whole New World - Alladin (Yeap^^)
11. What is in store for the weekend?
~ Ingat Kamu - Maia (You really know, I keep remembering n missing my mom...)
12. What song describes you?
~ Still Here - Westlife (Really, I'm still here, still in my room...)
13. To describe your grandparents?
~ Cobalah Mengerti - Peterpan (Peterpan, againnnnn? Phew... I'm bored... ^_-)
14. How is your life going?
~ Tender is the Night - Yuna Ito (Wakz...)
15. What song will they play at your funeral?
~ Fabulous - High School Musical 2 (Yeah, that's me... But, I think the song is too 'cheerful' for a funeral, anyway... Lol...)
16. How does the world see you?
~ Walau Habis Terang - Peterpan (See? My Winamp loves Peterpan so much... *Sigh...)
17. Will you have a happy life?
~ Bukan Superstar - Project Pop (Yeah, right, everyone knows that... I'm not a superstar... But, it didn't help to answer the question, though... Muahaha...)
18. What do your friends really think of you?
~ Separated - Usher (Right, I'm separated from them... Miss you all... Huhu... T-T)
19. Do people secretly lust after you?
~ Nothing's gonna Change My Love for You - Westlife (It means ... ? Err... Answers get more and more crazy... Haha...)
20. How can I make myself happy?
~ You are The Music in Me - High School Musical (It's true... Music can makes me happy... ^^)
21. What should you do with your life?
~ Beautiful Girl - JoJo (Ow!!!)
22. Will you ever have children?
~ A Moment like this - Leona Lewis (Will I?)
23. How do you picture yourself 5 years from now?
~ Never Apart - Michael Guang Liang (From whom????? I wonder, hmm... -_-)
24. What is best to describe your special someone?
~ Menunggu Pagi - Peterpan (Does it implicitly say, "It's tiring, boring, n nearly impossible"????)
25. What is in store for you in this coming month?
~ All or Nothing - Westlife (So, which one????)
26. What would your life be 10 years from now?
~ If I Never See Your Face Again - Maroon 5 ft Rihanna (I will be blind? >.<>
27. Will you be successful?
~ Survivor - Destiny's Child (Yes, I will...)
28. How was your childhood like?
~ Solitaire - Westlife (I kept playing 'Solitaire'? =P)
29. What song best describes your mood right now?
~ The Best Thing - Mocca (Really??? Aha... =D)
30. How was it answering this survey?
RULES:
1. Put your music player on shuffle.
2. Press forward for each question.
3. Use the song title as the answer to the question even if it doesn't make sense.
ABSOLUTELY NO CHEATING PLEASE!
1. How are you feeling today?
~ Tidur - Dewi Dee Lestari (I'm lack of sleep actually... Lol...)
2.Will you get far in life?
~ Somewhere Over The Rainbow - Connie Talbot (It means, "Yes, I will"?)
3. How do your friends see you?
~ Di Atas Normal - Peterpan (Now, I know they see me as an abnormal person... Muahahaha...)
4. Will you get married?
~ Back to Heaven's Light - Dewi Dee Lestari (Errr, does it mean I probably will not get married??? Nooooo...)
5. What is your best friend's theme song?
~ Langit Tak Mendengar - Peterpan (Eh, why my playlist keep choosing Dee n Peterpan's songs???)
6. What is the story of your life?
~ Bukan Lagu Cinta - Marcell (Yeah, my life is sure not full of love... >.<)
7. What was high school like?
~ Have You Ever - Westlife (Yes, I have!!! =P)
8. How can you get ahead in life?
~ When I'm With You - Westlife (Who is the 'you', by the way?)
9. What is the best thing about your friends?
~ Pacar Sementara - QTA (What does it mean??? Errr...)
10. What is today going to be like?
~ A Whole New World - Alladin (Yeap^^)
11. What is in store for the weekend?
~ Ingat Kamu - Maia (You really know, I keep remembering n missing my mom...)
12. What song describes you?
~ Still Here - Westlife (Really, I'm still here, still in my room...)
13. To describe your grandparents?
~ Cobalah Mengerti - Peterpan (Peterpan, againnnnn? Phew... I'm bored... ^_-)
14. How is your life going?
~ Tender is the Night - Yuna Ito (Wakz...)
15. What song will they play at your funeral?
~ Fabulous - High School Musical 2 (Yeah, that's me... But, I think the song is too 'cheerful' for a funeral, anyway... Lol...)
16. How does the world see you?
~ Walau Habis Terang - Peterpan (See? My Winamp loves Peterpan so much... *Sigh...)
17. Will you have a happy life?
~ Bukan Superstar - Project Pop (Yeah, right, everyone knows that... I'm not a superstar... But, it didn't help to answer the question, though... Muahaha...)
18. What do your friends really think of you?
~ Separated - Usher (Right, I'm separated from them... Miss you all... Huhu... T-T)
19. Do people secretly lust after you?
~ Nothing's gonna Change My Love for You - Westlife (It means ... ? Err... Answers get more and more crazy... Haha...)
20. How can I make myself happy?
~ You are The Music in Me - High School Musical (It's true... Music can makes me happy... ^^)
21. What should you do with your life?
~ Beautiful Girl - JoJo (Ow!!!)
22. Will you ever have children?
~ A Moment like this - Leona Lewis (Will I?)
23. How do you picture yourself 5 years from now?
~ Never Apart - Michael Guang Liang (From whom????? I wonder, hmm... -_-)
24. What is best to describe your special someone?
~ Menunggu Pagi - Peterpan (Does it implicitly say, "It's tiring, boring, n nearly impossible"????)
25. What is in store for you in this coming month?
~ All or Nothing - Westlife (So, which one????)
26. What would your life be 10 years from now?
~ If I Never See Your Face Again - Maroon 5 ft Rihanna (I will be blind? >.<>
27. Will you be successful?
~ Survivor - Destiny's Child (Yes, I will...)
28. How was your childhood like?
~ Solitaire - Westlife (I kept playing 'Solitaire'? =P)
29. What song best describes your mood right now?
~ The Best Thing - Mocca (Really??? Aha... =D)
30. How was it answering this survey?
~ Fireworks - Michael Guang Liang (Hoho...)
Thank you, Vien...
Thank you, Ti...
U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~
P.S. Time for ProbStats... Ganbatte!!!!
...
Organ tubuh yang harus benar-benar dijaga adalah mulut.
Apa yang diucapkan oleh mulutmu dapat melukai orang lain, tapi terkadang kata-kata yang keluar dari mulutmu dapat menghujam dirimu sendiri.
Ketika kau bicara, dan tak ada yang mendengarmu, kau terluka.
Ketika kau berkata dan dibalas dengan sengit dan tajam, mulutmu melukaimu.
Ketika kau bertanya dan jawaban mereka tak seperti yang kau harapkan, kembali kau membuka lukamu.
Bahkan ketika mulut ini tengah melukaiku,
U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Acronyms around us
NTU tends to have soooo much acronyms that may only be understood by people inside... NTU itself is a acronym, Nanyang Technological University a.k.a NTU... And it has EEE, CEE, NBS, SAC, NA, SSC, ISC, MaS, MSE, PaP, CBC, CBE, and a lot more that turn more and more similar to each other...
At my very first time here, I confused MSE and MaS... When people told me that they were from MaS, I said, confidently, "Oh, Material Science, right?"... Really, it's somehow very shameful, but, hey, I've passed my confusion phase... Now I know clearly what the difference between MSE and MAS, SSC and ISC, and also CBC and CBE... Muahahaha...
And, something took my attention today, since I went to the medical centre, is the acronym MC...
Yeah, MC...
Most of students in NTU know what MC is... If they don't know, I just can say two things... First, maybe they have just arrived to NTU for not more that 3 days... Or, second, they have lost their minds due to excessive pressure in studying... Lol...
So...
Let's move...
"I got headache"
"Go MC lor"
"I go take MC now"
"Why? You sick?"
"I skipped quizzes"
"Where are you now?"
"MC"
Which one is corect?
(a) MC is a thing that we need to do
(b) MC is a thing that we need to take
(c) MC is a place where we go to
Yeah, right...
All of them are right...
MC is medical checkup in the first conversation, medical certification in the second conversation, and medical centre in the third dialogs...
You see, one acronym for three things...
NTU is damn crazy in giving names...
Then, the last sentence before I turn whole-heartedly to my COM 201 lecture notes...
I will go to MC to do my MC and get MC to skip my lab
U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~
Sunday, October 12, 2008
Gema suara hati
Air mata ini seolah tak lagi berharga. Ia mengalir, mengalir, dan mengalir, seolah tak kan pernah habis. Begitu sering ia berontak, ingin keluar dari persinggahannya, merasa bebas sesaat, kemudian menguap, bersatu dengan dunia.
Air mata, sebuah keagungan yang tak terlukiskan. Bagaimana bulir-bulir air yang nyaris tak terlihat dapat melukiskan dalamnya perasaan, lebarnya luka, dan luasnya kebahagiaan sungguh merupakan keistimewaan luar biasa. Bagaimana emosi yang berkecamuk di dalam hati yang luar biasa jauhnya dari mata dapat terpancarkan oleh air mata juga adalah bukti keindahan yang tak tergantikan.
Sungguh, air mata benar-benar mampu melukiskan apa yang ada di dalam rongga imajiner yang kita sebut hati ini. Sebutir air mata yang seringkali dianggap tak berharga sesungguhnya adalah apa yang kau rasakan, gema dari suara hati yang menjerit-jerit minta diungkapkan dan seringkali kau abaikan. Ketika kau meneteskan air mata, kau mengakui perasaanmu pada dunia, kau sadar dan kau menerima, bahwa dirimu lemah dan butuh dukungan.
Dan akhir-akhir ini, air mata ini semakin sering mengalir, membentuk sungai kecil yang selalu cepat-cepat aku putuskan alirannya. Terkadang ia tercekat, tak mau keluar dari tempat tinggalnya yang nyaman, hanya karena perasaanku yang malu akan sebuah kenyataan, sebuah kenyataan bahwa aku lemah.
Tak mau menangis, tak mau menerima dan tak mau mengakui kelemahan, kerapuhan, kesusahan pada dunia. Tidak mengeluarkan air mata bukan berarti tidak punya kelemahan.
Dalam aliran yang mengandung kristal-kristal cemerlang itu, aku berenang, kelelahan, lalu tenggelam.
U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~
Aku dan kesendirian
Sepi
Hanya aku dan kesendirian
Berdua
Benar-benar berdua
Aku dan kesendirian
Tak ada yang dapat memisahkan kita
Aku telah terikat sempurna kepadanya oleh benang tak kasat mata
Aku jatuh cinta pada kesendirian, walau terkadang aku benci padanya
Aku menikmati romantisme yang ia buat, walau terkadang aku ingin melepaskan diri darinya
Aku tertawa bersamanya, walau tak jarang aku ngambek-ngambek karenanya
Aku mencari-cari dirinya kala ia tak ada, walau tak jarang aku meronta-ronta ingin lepas darinya
Aku selalu curhat kepadanya, walau seringkali aku bosan pada pertanyaan-pertanyaannya
Aku bersandar pada pundaknya, walau seringkali aku mencoba lari dari pangkuannya
Aku dan kesendirian
Terikat oleh benang tak kasat mata
Aku dan kesendirian
Punya dunia yang tak tergapai kenyataan
Aku dan kesendirian
Punya idealisme yg menyatukan kita
Kesendirian
Begitu membuatku jatuh cinta
Juga begitu membuatku merana
U're the best I've ever had
P.S. Thanks for those who gave me this inspiration^^
Wednesday, October 08, 2008
Hanya satu
Walaupun sudah puluhan, ratusan, bahkan ribuan kali diguyur air hujan, jalan ini masih sama, tak sedikitpun berubah
Walaupun sudah terlalu sering diterpa angin dan disinari matahari, pohon-pohon ini masih sama, tak sedikitpun berubah
Walalupun sudah begitu banyak debu yang singgah dan dibersihkan, teras-teras ini masih sama, tak sedikitpun berubah
Saat aku sendiri berjalan di jalan ini, jalan panjang dengan pohon-pohon dan teras-teras di tepiannya, aku sadar, tak ada yang berubah
Yang berubah hanya satu, yaitu aku
Ya, hanya aku, yang tak lagi berjalan bersamamu
U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~
Sunday, October 05, 2008
Aarrggh...
Saya ga cukup marah sampe bisa meneriakkan sumpah serapah dan mengeluarkan segala isi kebun binatang... Saya ga cukup marah sampe bisa mengacak-acak meja belajar dan membanting komputer saya... Bener, saya ga semarah itu, tapi saya cukup marah sampe mengambil keputusan mau menuliskan ini di blog saya...
Saya kira hubungan kami yang seperti anjing dan kucing bisa terselamatkan... Pelan-pelan, saya berusaha mengalah, mengesampingkan ego saya, dan berusaha sabar mendengarkan kata demi kata, yang seringkali irrasional dan tak masuk akal, sambil meredam hasrat saya untuk mematahkan semua kata, kalimat, paragraf, bahkan wacana tanpa inti yang dia buat... Sudah beberapa minggu ini saya mencoba bersikap lebih 'manis' kepadanya, dan saya sudah membuat kemajuan pesat... Saya bisa sedikit-sedikit menahan mulut saya yang gatal untuk meneriakkan "skak mat" di depan mukanya...
Namun kini, saya muak... Saya muak dengan kata-katanya, muak dengan tingkah lakunya, muak dengan ekspresi mukanya, muak dengan senyumnya, saya muak dengan segalanya... Ingin rasanya saya muntahkan ini semua di hadapannya, tapi saya memilih bungkam... Silence is golden, kata mereka...
Siang ini, saya marah... Saya merasa dilecehkan...
Secara tersirat, dia mengatakan saya menganggap dia tong sampah dengan memberikan sesuatu yang sudah dekat masa kedaluarsa...
Ketika saya menjelaskan bahwa saya minta tolong ex-roomate saya memberikan itu kepada mereka karena saya lupa bawa balik barang-barangnya ke Palembang, dia, dengan senyum menggelikan, ekspresi memuakkan, dan nada yang memerahkan telinga, bilang, "Oh, jadi kalo barang yang masih bagus dan belum mau kedaluarsa, jangan dikasih ke orang ya?"
Oke...
Ya, sekali lagi, saya ngasih barang-barang itu ke kalian karena saya lupa bawa balik ke Palembang... Dan lagi, saya ga inten sama sekali untuk memberikan itu ke kamu dan kenapa kamu yang sewot dan ngatain saya?
Kalo kamu ga suka barang gratisan yang udah deket masa kedaluarsa, ya, udah, ga usah diambil waktu ada yang nawarin... Dan kalo kamu ga suka, kenapa kamu yang selalu antri paling depan kalo ada pembagian goodie bag? Kenapa kamu yang matanya ijo sendiri kalo liat orang bagi-bagi barang gratis? Please, ya, sebelum kamu nge-lecture saya, lebih baik kamu bercermin dulu...
Ketika dia tau saya marah, dengan entengnya dia bilang "sorry", "gomen", dan kata-kata yang artinya "maaf"... Ouke, memaafkan bukan perkara mudah, Bang... Saya ga mau di mulut bilang udah maafin, tapi di hati saya masih menggerutu...
Dan yang bikin saya tambah marah, dia bilang bahwa dia HANYA memberi saran kepada saya dan itu untuk KEBAIKAN saya... Dia masih bisa dengan bangganya bilang bahwa dia orang baik... Catat, dia bilang dia ORANG BAIK...
Semoga dia baca postingan ini dan semoga dia masih bisa ngerasa kalo saya sedang membahas tentang dia...
U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~
Saturday, October 04, 2008
Sorry, ICN2008...
And now, when most of Indonesians post the photos of ICN, write about ICN in their blog, and talk about ICN whenever, I will also do it... I'm not going to praise or write any comments about the performance, not because I was not satisfied, but it's all just because I didn't come to watch...
I missed two times T'Spray Cultural Day... And ICN will not be held next year due to IAF or something... So, the one and only time for me to enjoy ICN will come in my final year...
Ya, you can call me 'an-sos' as many times as you like, as frequent as you wish, but that was my decision and I didn't regret about it...
I want to say a bunch of sorry to all the committee members and the performers... Actually, lot asked me to come, but at the end, I decided not to... I tell you all again, it's not because I didn't like you, or I didn't like Indonesia, or I didn't like Indonesian culture, or I didn't lalala lilili... I was just 'an-sos' and slow in deciding, full-stop...
Although I didn't watch you all, I know that you all did a very fabulous job... Really, from the bottom of my heart, I want to congrat you all...
You all are rockz!!!
U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~
NTU Alumni Day... Relive, Remember, Renew...
I just came back from the NTU Alumni Day... Of course I went there not as a guest or a 'guest', although I ate a lot, too much maybe... Omigod, I need to discipline my mouth... Lol... Ok, it's unimportant... I went there as a student helper... Yeah, without any payment or something... I just got a bright yellow shirt, a box of lunch and additional foods, a chance to take photo with President Su Guanning and minister something (gosh, I forgot his name!!!), some new friends, and a thing to write in here...^^
Actually I just carelessly applied as a helper... Without long thinking, I submitted my application and I was just chosen...
And ushering those alumni there, I imagined that, someday, I would be the one being invited... I would be the one bringing my two-year-old son... I would be the one hanging around with my business cards in my hand in order to expand my networking wings... I would be the one being ushered... And if I am bright enough, I will be the one receiving the award... Ya, the last sentence is just applicable in the condition that I am BRIGHT enough... And I hope I will be bright enough in my future... *Daydreaming is not prohibited by law, right?
And one phenomena is that the women alumni tended to gather with other women and talked about non-business things, like about houseworks, their children, their grandchildren, or about other family-related things... It was very different with the atmosphere around the crowd of CEO-looking men who were always talking about their working matters... Hahaha...
I wonder which group I will be in, the gossip-women groups or the CEO-looking groups, in the next few years...^^
Another thing that I watched was a couple that looked so nice... Actually I said they were nice not because they were good looking or something... They even doesn't have one thing important that people have, they don't have eyesight, but they really looked so nice to me... Why??? You see, they are almost blind, frankly speaking, but they could come to this 'ulu' NTU to remember all things they had passed through... Yeah, they loved NTU soooo much... Maybe because NTU was the 'red-line-that-tied-their-hearts'...
And again, I wonder if NTU can be my red line, also... If it happens, forty years later, I will come to the alumni day, with him holding my hand... Aaaaa, so sweet...^^
Now I can still being the usher, while the other day, without my realization, I will be the one holding the invitation card...
The time will come...
Very fast, of course...
U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~
Thursday, October 02, 2008
Rindu dirimu
Hari ini saya merasa kangen banget sama mama... Kangeeeeeeeeeeeeen banget... Padahal kemaren baru aja telpon-telponan, hari ini udah kangen lagi... Yaaah, apa mau dikata, emangnya kangen bisa diajak kompromi?
Tanpa saya sadari, udah setahun lebih saya jauh dari mama, jauh dari keluarga... Tanpa saya sadari, sudah setahun lebih saya nyari makan sendiri setiap hari, sudah setahun lebih saya nyuci sendiri, sudah setahun lebih saya bersih-bersih sendiri, dan sudah setahun lebih saya menjalani kehidupan saya sebagai mahasiswi...
Dan tadi siang, saat saya lagi jalan sendirian dari Library 2 ke LT 7 buat lecture MoM, saya berpikir, "Apa jadinya saya di sini kalo ga ada mama?"
Mama, yang menemani malam-malam saya via Skype...
Mama, yang menemani hari-hari saya via SMS...
Mama, yang tetap rajin mengingatkan saya untuk tidur, makan, dan berdoa...
Mama, yang super hebat bagi saya...
Mama, yang T O P B G T...
Mama, yang amat sangat saya sayang...
Huhu, saya bener-bener ingin pulang dan ingin ketemu mama... Saya ingin shopping bareng mama, ingin nonton sinetron bareng mama, ingin tidur di samping mama, ingin makan bareng mama (dan keluarga), ingin bantu mama potong-potong sayur, ingin bantu mama nyapu dan ngepel, ingin nonton mama masak... Bahkan, saya ingin kena marah mama... Huix...
Dulu saya sempat berpikir kalo saya terlalu bergantung sama mama... Saya ga pernah belanja sendiri atau ngapa-ngapain sendiri... Saya selalu ditemani mama dan saya selalu minta pendapat mama... Kalo SK ga keluar, ya, batal belinya... Haha... Dan saya sempat mikir mungkin saat-saat di mana saya bisa foya-foya sendiri itu indah... Tapi kenyataannya, di saat sekarang saya bisa ngatur pengeluaran saya sendiri, saya ngerasa rindu sama masa-masa itu... >.<
Saya beruntung punya mama yang gaul abis... Yang bisa diajak ngeceng-ngeceng di mall, shopping-shopping sampe puas, chatting, SMSan, maen-maen Skype, foto-foto narsis, de el el, de es be, de es te...
Dan mungkin, mama saya akan bikin facebook sesaat lagi...
Hwahahaha...
Mama...
Rindu dirimu...
U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~
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