aLL 'BouT 'Fe-Ar'

These days I started to feel homesick. I always had a weird dream about home, mom, and my hometown for every single time I closed my eyes. When I walked alone every morning, I imagined how my house looked like in  such a morning. When I ate, I remembered my mom's cooking as well as all those foods I liked very much. When I was alone, I realized I was longing for the journey we would have after my internship ended.

This is one of my problems living here. I missed home very often. And I wonder, whether I will still miss my home in every second of my life when I graduate from NTU. I even have a plan to continue my study overseas. How can I bear with it if I am still being such a pampered kid?

I remember one of the Indonesian songs, called 'Rumah Kita'. In english, it's translated become 'Our Home'. And I really think this song resembles me.

Tanpa hiasan, tanpa lukisan (Without any ornaments, without any paintings)

Beratap jerami, beralaskan tanah (The roof is only thatch, the floor is only ground)

Namun semua ini punya kita (But, all these are ours)

Memang semua ini punya kita, sendiri (All these are really ours)

Tanpa anyelir, tanpa melati (Without carnation, without jasmine)

Hanya bunga bakung tumbuh di halaman (Only lily can grow on the yard)

Namun semua itu milik kita (But, all these are ours)

Memang semua itu milik kita,sendiri (All these are really ours)

Segala nikmat dan anugerah yang kuasa (All the blessings and gifts from God)

Semuanya ada disini (Everything is here)

Rumah kita (In our home)

I tried to translate it in English since I felt like discussing it. Really, my home is not the best spot in this world and my hometown is really far from a word called 'comfortable' to describe it. I couldn't go out from home that easily since safety and security was one of the issues. The transportation system was far from good. When I walked, most probably I would catch those naughty men's eyes on me. And  when it rained, I could find water puddles everywhere.

But, really, I still miss my hometown so badly. I miss going to the traditional market with my mom and helping her carrying a large amount of shopping bags. I miss watching her cooking while I was blabbing about bits and pieces of my life. I miss having lunches and dinners in those good restaurants for at least once a week with my family. I miss travelling here and there using my parents' car. I miss being picked up by bf using his car. I miss going for facial and hair treatment with a reasonable amount of spending. I miss sleeping in my parents' room. I miss buying a few novels in a really cheap price. I miss those stupid Indonesian dramas. I miss being scolded by my mom for being a lazy girl. I miss giving my dad a black face for inhaling his cigarette smoke. I miss quarreling with my bro due to a very silly arguments. I miss going to the K-box. I miss playing badminton with a big bunch of my friends. I miss going shopping with my mom. I miss my home. I miss my hometown. I miss my old days.

I really can wait no more for June to come and bring me back home.



U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~